Day 11. I had a minor accident in my sleep..... surely finally falling to sleep to the sounds of 'Schindlers List' would be enough to send Russell Brand into a period of no sex... Apparently to me it means I'm 3 days premature to Tyler's prediction of my first wet dream.
I think it's been 15 years since this last happened to me. I'm going to be sleeping in pants for some time, possibly nappies.
Other than that, and possibly because of it, I feel alright today. I'm sat outside a bar in Soho tapping away in the sun, and life feels good - I've got this unnerving feeling that I am actually going to do this.
I've started the day with a new haircut. Simon (my hairdresser) inevitably asks how the situation with women is going.... I hadn't prepared for this, but seeing as he's been cutting my hair for just over a year (pretty much when my sex life took over my actual life) and he's seen and heard more stories than you're average hairdresser should hear, maybe I should have been. He thinks I'm mad, he also suggested that a "flat-top" a "step" or an "undercut" would get a 'handsome looking chap like me' through the next 29 days as 'no woman talks to a man with an undercut' I went for the standard, and am just going to use my growing willpower to get through it.
It's not so much the sex, I can deal without women, there's only one I want to be with at the moment anyway, and she wants nothing to do with me. I just don't trust myself, and seeing as I can't see myself whilst tossing one off I don't see a good haircut as a particular risk.
Many an hour later and I've breezed through what looks to be a pain free and fairly easy day. Awaiting a curry with Greg, before heading to the local for a few more pints (I'm still drinking to much, but one can't wank with a pint in one hand and a smoke in the other.... Also, I'm fairly sure it doesn't sit well with other patrons of what is a very nice pub.)
A fairly dull account of a fairly uneventful day. The local's always been good to me though, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed that due to the fact Milwall won today it'll be full of hooligans and will therefore deter any summer dresses.
More tomorrow.
